After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
