We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
