okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
