just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
