Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
