you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize
