if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
