Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
