i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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