so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
