it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize