so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Randomize
