You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
