Is it normal to miss your booty call?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
So here I am, sexting at work.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
