Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize