he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
