i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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