Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
