It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
