carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
you mean i was at the winter classic?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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