Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
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