I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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