I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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