everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
