so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
