yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
