you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize