he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
