Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize