If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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