belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
