Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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