im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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