I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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