we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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