Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize