dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
We have so much sex to catch up on
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
