I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
are you so shy because you have an std?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
