Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Randomize
