spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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