you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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