i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
