Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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