So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
