i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize