ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
