I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Never underestimate the power of titties
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