ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize