You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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