Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
